July’s blog theme has been about seeking what is necessary for this phase in life’s journey. I have written about letting go of items and emotions that no longer are of benefit in order to move forward effectively in life. To be mindful of the treasures I have and to manage them well has been a continuing work-in-progress.
We are but strangers and pilgrims on this earth and it would be wise to remember this in life. My journey is different than yours, but what we need for each journey is the same. Doubt? Fear? Despair? They have no place in the Christian’s heart. In letting go of excess effects and emotions, I am more able to carry steadfastly confidence, courage, and hope.
“We are not citizens of this world trying to make our way to heaven; we are citizens of heaven trying to make our way into this world. That radical Christian insight can be life-changing. We are not to live so as to earn God’s love, inherit heaven, and purchase our salvation. All those are given to us as gifts; gifts bought by Jesus on the cross and handed over to us. We are to live as God’s redeemed, as heirs of heaven, and as citizens of another land; the Kingdom of God…We live as those who are on a journey home; a home we know will have the lights on and the door open and our Father waiting for us when we arrive. That means in all adversity, our worship of God is joyful, our life is hopeful, our future is secure. There is nothing we can lose on earth that can rob us of the treasures God has given us and will give us.”
Borrowed from Patches of Godlight by Jan Karon
July’s Stray Gifts: Red, White, Blue, The Number Four
The two photos of red flowers are of our crepe myrtle tree and of oleanders. This crepe myrtle has been stepped on quite a few times by our dog running over it to catch a ball and by us when we were planting our Lady Banks rose bush nearby. I thought for sure we had killed it by now, but it’s still alive. I saw the oleanders on UTEP’s campus one day when I took Jonathan to class. Gorgeous! White and blue morning glories are gracing our yard now in various places. And there are four bunches of yellow bells on the bush. We planted them last year and they have come back in full force.
Family Update: My husband was operated on Monday, July 22, to have his right hip replaced. He was released from the hospital the next day. According to in-home care (the nurse, the physical therapy supervisor, and the physical therapist), John is doing really well. He is able to go up and down the stairs (with the aid of crutches) with no pain and moves around (carefully) well. After two weeks, he should be able to walk without the aid of his walker, feel less bruised from the surgery, and reduce pain medication. He will have in-home physical therapy five days a week for three weeks and a few weeks of therapy in another location afterwards, I believe. We are thankful for a successful surgery and are amazed by the difference in how he feels. He will still need the left hip replaced in time.
And now to the last in the series of entries on the topic: “Even Places”-
Third: A Step of Consciousness– Listen for the ‘Why’ to Clear the Chaos
A few years ago, when I came across the phrase in Psalm 26:12, “My foot standeth in an even place”, I had no idea how those seven words would be changing me over time. The last several blog posts have been about the journey to owning less stuff. My husband and I went through this a few years ago and I have been renewing purpose once again to evaluate items in our home. In this “Step of Consciousness”, part of seeking balance in life with stuff we owned was looking for why we had held on to excess clothing no longer worn, excess books we no longer read, excess stuff tucked away in boxes no longer needed or wanted, and excess emotions that weighed us down. We had kept these things through multiple cross-country moves over the years and knew if we ever moved again, carrying the excess baggage would be overwhelming. There are still more desk drawers to look through, clothing to be edited, and floor space to be cleared.
We had a few reasons for why we held on to things. On my part, I had saved clothes in hopes to wear my smaller-sized ones again. I had kept baby clothes in dreams to have another baby someday. I had hoarded items in boxes for sentimental reasons (even though I did not look in them often enough to be worth keeping). I had stored gifts given (that I did not need, but someone else could use) out of guilt. I had carried excess emotions and weight which held me back from growing strong physically and spiritually. While I have parted with quite a few boxes, books, and belongings in the last few years, I am ready to make strides in making more progress. These things take time (patience and wisdom, too)!
Seek peace and pursue it.
Psalm 34:14b
Part of Psalm 34:14 says, “Seek peace, and pursue it.” In finding balance in the last few years during major life changes and health challenges, this phrase had become a motto as well. Harmony with food/weight, finances, relationships, possessions is still on my mind and heart as I again go through this process of clearing space.
Answering the ‘why’ of holding onto not-needed/wanted items or emotions is a huge step in setting free possessions in life which are no longer of service. Whether the answer is guilt, emotional attachment or the task is too overwhelming to simplify, I had to face the issues head-on and let go to make any progress. I could not proceed forward to weight loss goals, to fewer distractions, and to simple living in the midst of disorder, confusion, and ‘mental fog’. As I look to streamline more, I seek to be reasonable in what our needs are in this phase of life.
It can seem a daunting task to clear out a closet, a room, a desk (a kitchen drawer, a garage, a shed, a dresser, a bookshelf…a.k.a. any avoided location) but once started, I find it usually does not take as much time as I thought it would. The key is to start. Sometimes I feel motivated to “cleanse” all at once. Other times, clearing or cleaning just three things immediately noticeable is about all I can do. Either method works!
I began the process a few years ago (and again recently) of finding peace by clearing excess e-mail subscriptions instead of trying to keep up with new recipes, exercises, and too many DIY projects. I stick to the meals my family knows and loves. I enjoy walking or rebounding for exercise and none of those crazy-energetic aerobic workouts. And I do NOT have the patience for DIY projects. I moved on to clearing just three things in a room at a time instead of stressing over trying to get it all done in one fell swoop during busy seasons.
Releasing ‘chaos’ by acknowledging what really matters helps me identify the beneficial in the present phase in life. Part of Hebrews 12:1 comes to mind about laying “aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us.” It takes physical effort (emotional and spiritual, too) to achieve the balance needed to move forward effectively. Excess stuff and emotions try patience, plague peace of mind, hinder productivity and limit the ability to make space for new and better things ahead.
My foot standeth in an even place: in the congregations will I bless the LORD.
Last week in A Step of Clarity- Find Your Even Place Part I, I shared a few thoughts on clearing space in the home and in my mind and heart. In my search for level ground amid the present challenging phase of life, instead of starting something new, I stopped doing a few things that were distracting from my work as a wife and mom. There seemed to be for me a lot of extra distractions from outside sources that were limiting me from living well and being all present. I stopped signing up for new and interesting e-mails and unsubscribed from ones which were no longer of interest or that I never read. The e-mail subscriptions, while good and potentially helpful, were piling up in my inbox and I was spending time on deleting them every week without ever reading any of them. I deactivated all social media accounts to clear my head and to focus on my own home. With my husband facing total hip replacement this month, I needed to eliminate distractions for more mental clarity.
This week, I am sharing “A Step of Consistency”. Look and Clear 3 has been my key thought process recently and it has been very beneficial in keeping the house running and in ‘presentable’ shape. Rather than being overwhelmed by a long to-do list, I look for three things needing to be done. When I am in the bathroom getting ready for the morning, instead of fretting over finding time to thoroughly clean, I pick three areas in need of attention – which varies from day to day. Clean off the counter, sweep, and throw away the trash. Another day I do three different tasks; wipe down the mirror, the sinks, and clean the toilet quickly. The same goes for other areas in the house. I wipe down, clean or tidy up, throw away, or shred three things and move on with the day. At first, it didn’t seem like much, but there is a noticeable difference by the end of the week. My tendency is to do all or nothing which can be very overwhelming. An all or nothing frame of mind hinders clarity and consistency in managing my day well.
In my continuing journey to own less, the “Look and Clear 3” mindset is helpful in this area of life as well. (For more on this, see my blog post: The Journey to Less Stuff.) The task of going through old boxes, drawers, and files can be mind-numbing. If I regularly take care of just three items, I still feel a sense of accomplishment in clearing space and getting organized. I want to manage what I have well, be intentional about what I own, and move forward wisely in the time I spend caring for things.
If you are feeling stressed by tasks left undone, try taking a quick look around in the space you are in throughout the day and consistently clear three things which are immediately noticeable. I am confident that within a week, you will notice a difference in the level of peace in your home and in your heart and mind.
My foot standeth in an even place: in the congregations will I bless the Lord.
Old high school and college photo albums were looked through one last time and while I have great memories, I realized I no longer needed to hold on to them. Photos and saved greeting cards were shredded or recycled.
Homeschool material I had kept was shredded or recycled and books were donated that my son did not want to keep. Because he had become a college student, I no longer needed to hold on to all that paper! (I had files of school work and shelves of books from over the years.)
My mother’s box of memories that was given to me was just that- her memories. I kept a few photos, my son wanted her 4-H notebook, but anything else in there had no special attachment since I was three years old when she passed away. I realized I was close to my mother’s side of the family and the memories they and my dad’s side of the family share of her meant more to me than her school yearbooks and scrapbooks. That box of her memories had been through seven states and one foreign country and stored in a corner of a closet or garage. It was time to do something with it.
Series of books I had loved but no longer read were given to a friend who I thought might enjoy them.
Note: It may seem harsh or unfeeling to ‘dispose’ of sentimental items such as photo albums, old notes from friends, things given to me, but I knew I had to say “enough” at some point -enough of storing things in drawers, files, or boxes left untouched for long periods of time. I wanted to manage what I had well, be intentional about what I owned, and move forward wisely in time spent caring for things.
My foot standeth in an even place: in the congregations will I bless the Lord.
Psalm 26:12
When I went through this process a few years ago, I had the theme in mind of finding an “even place” or a balanced perspective. It became increasingly difficult to ‘bless the Lord’ when I felt overwhelmed. There was so much I possessed that I did not need anymore. I felt indifferent to a lot of things I had been keeping for one reason or another. I had a difficult time, though, in knowing where to start. I lacked clarity of mind to make that first decision on what to empty, throw out, or donate first. What I started with back in 2016 was not in finding a place to start, but in figuring out what to stop. I wanted to articulate what was adding stress or more pressure. I needed space to breathe, to think, and to restore. And things that were taking up space which took my breath away due to frustration, I needed to clear.
I am at that place again, so I am revisiting what I had done a few years ago to make more headway in clearing space- whether physically (in a closet, on a shelf, etc.), emotionally, or mentally. And I do believe clearing space affects my spiritual life as well.
The first place to find some balance is with internet ‘stuff’ and this is how I am seeking clarity:
I am stopping all social media. I deactivated my Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest. There is a lot of negativity, over-sharing, information overload, scrolling and scrolling on my part, and distracting ‘mental noise’ for me right now. I told my husband the other day I felt my brain was ‘quieter’ since taking a step away. I felt I could be more mindful about my time. I could focus more on me and what I needed to be doing rather than what the masses were doing. I still keep in touch with those close to me through text or through Messenger.
I am stopping signing up for new recipes, health news, weight loss helps, gardening tips, etc. E-mails pile up and I never get around to reading all of them. If I need to look something up, Google is readily available.
While it is a meager start, it is a start nonetheless. It is where I began on the journey to find level ground a few years ago. When I stepped away from social media, I felt a nice quietness to my thoughts. When I started cleaning up the e-mails, I was able to see clearly the messages which needed a response.
There is more to come on clearing up space in my next entry: A Step of Consistency – Find Your Even Place Part II. For this week, though, I am stopping a few things that are distracting from my work as a wife and mom and seeking clarity of mind.
If you are seeking for clarity, maybe instead of looking to start something new, consider STOPPING something first–something that may be hindering your focus on what really matters in your life. Take a step back. Evaluate what is important. Clear some space. Breathe.
My foot standeth in an even place: in the congregations will I bless the Lord.
Psalm 26:12
A few years ago on my former blog, I wrote a series of posts about finding balance in life with stuff. We had just made a decision to simplify our work in ministry and my husband made a leap of faith to enroll in college courses to become a full time student. We felt overwhelmed. We felt at odds with ourselves, our finances, and our stuff that had built up over the years. He is now a college graduate, but due to the need to have both hips replaced, looking for work has been put on hold. We are thankful for his veteran benefits due to time served in the Navy. The blog post series entitled “Finding Your Even Place” was written in 2016. Three years later, we still have need for balance in some areas. Over the last few years, we have downsized quite a bit, but lately we have found that we could work on it a bit more. I am finding the more stuff we own, the more we have to manage it, find a place for it, clean it, etc.
In studying through the Psalms that year, I referred often to the phrase which became our new mantra; “My foot standeth in an even place” -Psalm 26:11.
An even place: balanced, steady, continuous, unwavering.
I did not know where to begin in finding an ‘even place’ or balance with issues that felt overwhelming. There had been so much going on in my mind of things I needed to clear out that were weighing me down, but I had too much that was weighing me down to do what needed doing. All that added stress. And who needs more stress??? And now with my husband facing two hip replacement surgeries and physical therapy, among other life challenges, I am definitely needing a steady frame of mind. Another Scripture verse which stood out to me is in Hebrews.
Let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us…and let us run with patience the race that is set before us.
Hebrews 12:1
I still think of that verse often as, again, I am going through my closets, desk drawers, papers that need to be shred. Stuff (especially things I do not really need but I have due to various reasons) tends to be a distraction and takes away from a peaceful frame of mind.
While we have made great strides over the last three years in cleaning out items we no longer need, we could do another revision. For July, I am revisiting the old blog posts, renewing purpose to find more balance, and rewriting the posts with fresh perspective.
Faith does not eliminate questions. But faith knows where to take them.
Elisabeth Elliot
In my last blog entry, The Journey to Less Stuff, I shared about working to live with less. I have been reading a lot of blog posts and articles about simple living and about living satisfied with simple pleasures. Sometimes a lack of contentment in God’s provisions stems from a lack of confidence. I tend to compare my ‘stuff’, status in life, and self to others. What holds me back from fully trusting is not what I have, but what I think I don’t have. I believe, though, that when I am a good steward with what I am graced with and I live well with His graces, contentment follows. And when “Thy will be done” becomes the heart’s desire, it is then that my mind is stable and satisfied with God in the lead.
I may not understand where God has me right now. I may not know why God created me a certain way. But when I take my eyes off Him and look on the lives of others or to self for answers, I lack wisdom.
“If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him. But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed. For let not that man think that he shall receive any thing of the Lord.”
James 1:5-7
God gives wisdom generously and without scolding when I ask for it in full faith. But when I go back and forth between trusting and uncertainty, He knows that I am like a sea’s wave moved by winds of doubt. And God does not reward a double minded mindset.
Faith in God still has questions. Lots of them. But stability and satisfaction comes from looking to the right Source for the answers and being wise enough to know that God has His own timing in everything to reveal a matter- even if it means something to know only when I get to Heaven. True faith is confident to take those questions to the throne of Grace and leave them there.
